Print your way through the zombie apocalypse
Zombies aren't something we usually worry about at the crow's nest. But they're an ever present possibility, and the upcoming release of 28 Years Later - another no-doubt disappointing sequel to the classic 28 Days later - has us wondering how we'd fare if the zombie apocalypse came to pass.
Yes, zombies would definitely be a danger but there's the complete collapse of society, infrastructure, and civilisation to think of, too. No power, no running water, no food.
It's always worth preparing for the worst, and as we have a large-format 3D printer squirreled away in our lair, printing the gear we would need to survive events triggered by a horde of brain-eating former hums should be both simple and cheap.
This is what we decided we'd need:
A bicycle
Cities are a dangerous place to be when there are zombies about. If there's a single zombie in your neighbourhood, you can be sure that more people will become infected, then suddenly there are dozens, hundreds, thousands even - all looking for fresh brains to eat and people to infect.
Getting out of town is the best option, and with the roads doubtless jammed with traffic, a bicycle is a great way to get you there.
There are hundreds of bicycle designs you can print, but most of them are miniatures, and scaling up won't leave you with a working two-wheeled conveyance.
Rather than printing an entire, full-sized bicycle, it's a better idea to print the parts that will allow you to build a frame from scavenged materials.
ColorFabb's 3D Printed bike aims to do just that - proving joints into which you can slot frame tubes gears and the rest of what makes a bicycle. As we already have a stable of bikes out back, we're all ready to to. Make sure you are, too.
Fishing rod
After an exhausting ride to a secluded brook in the countryside you're likely to be exhausted and in need of sustenance. Fish are easy to come by but difficult to catch without a rod.
On the other hand, a rod is bulky, difficult to carry, and will likely attract the attention of the roving hordes.
The Sharky fishing rod, isn't actually a rod. It's fish-catching gear that's small enough to fit into your back pocket. It comprises a reel with a locking mechanism, and a quick release. There's also a hole for a carabiner in case you want to clip it to your belt. We built the Sharky - which is currently on V5 - but have yet to catch any fish. We put this down to our own lack of skill, rather than any inherent fault in the design. It's quick, easy, and we see know reason why it shouldn't work.
A solar still
Clean water is a must, and who knows what's died jut around the bend upstream of your little camp.
Solar stills purify water using the sun’s energy to mimic the natural water cycle through evaporation and condensation.
Depending on where you are in the world, the amount of water you get out of it will vary.
Super Steve's survival distiller certainly looks the part, and requires mason jars, plastic piping, a computer fan, and either batteries or solar panels to run.
Bows and Crossbows
Regardless of how peace-loving you are, at some point you're going to need weaponry. Maybe you're retreating from the undead as they come for you or maybe, you're getting tired of eating fish every day.
Recent years have seen a plethora of new and innovative crossbow designs proliferating, and our favourite is the Slinghammer and it's variants.
Originally designed to chuck ball bearings of of to 12 mm diameter using an 80-lb off-the-shelf pistol crossbow limb, the Slinghammer is a repeating crossbow, meaning you can cock and reload it quickly, using a lever to slide the magazine forward, catch the string, and return it.
If you're using ball bearings, you have a 40-ish shot magazine, which you can empty in under a minute. It's fast, and you really wouldn't want to be hit by one of these.
If you want to up your lethality, you can try the Slinghammer conversion kit, which fires either 7.5-inch or 6.5-inch bolts. Would it kill a zombie? Maybe. Would it absolutely ruin its day? 100%.
Using the 7.5" bolts from the powerstroke model, we've gone clean through a roasting joint. We doubt it would go through bone though. The powerstroke package will give you an eight-bolt mag - which you can empty in about 10 seconds. We've not timed, but that feels about right.
The standard bolt chucker is less powerful as it has a shorter stroke, but comes with option of a 20-shot doublestack magazine.
So far we've printed both the powerstroke and standard models, equipped them with laser pointers, and dialled them in at 150 fps. If you want any oncoming zombies to resemble a porcupine, these will do the job.
We also printed the ball-bearing chucker for the daughter and equipped it with Theraband Gold elastic resistance fitness band. It can rapid-fire 12mm steel balls at 130 fps. Again, it's unlikely to kill a zombie, but it'll give it a hell of a headache.
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